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S5 E13 - The Unexpected Source of Power with Tom Garcia
In this episode of Unlocked, Madelyn Blair hosts a rich, reflective conversation with healer, shaman, and wisdom keeper Dr. Tom Garcia, joined by co-host and conversational expert Dr. Kelly Cresup. The episode centers on three intertwined themes: identity, boundaries, and the kind of inner work that leads to resilience and spiritual leadership.
Madelyn opens by introducing Tom’s long path through the healing arts and his contribution to the book The Difference, in which his chapter “Roar at the Moon” describes a crucible moment in his life. Asked why identity matters, Tom explains that most people define themselves by superficial markers—age, career, roles—but beneath those layers is a deeper, truer identity. His work is about helping people discover that inner self, which becomes a source of purpose, guidance, and humility.
Tom shares his own circuitous path: uncertain at 18, he joined the Navy, later left to pursue chiropractic, then moved into men’s work and, eventually, a deep spiritual path catalyzed by the death of a close friend. Caring for this friend in his final months broke Tom open and led him into nights by the fire, journaling, “roaring at the moon,” and asking the profound questions: Who am I? Why am I here? Who sent me? In that solitude, he learned to listen for an inner voice—what he calls internal guidance—which he believes everyone has.
The conversation then turns to boundaries. Tom recounts a conflict with a friend that led to an epiphany: he was angry about a boundary violation, but realized he’d never truly defined his own boundaries. He began consciously exploring where he ended and others began—physically, emotionally, energetically—and how honoring himself allowed him to honor others. Over time, he learned that a strong sense of self creates a kind of field around us that discourages intrusion.
Kelly invites Tom to talk about conflict and “energy vampires.” Tom describes becoming very calm when challenged, recognizing that most attacks are really about the other person, not him. From that place, he can respond with direct yet compassionate questions like, “What do you really need?” Sometimes, simply refusing to “feed” draining behavior is the healthiest boundary; other times, a firm “Knock that off” is necessary. Across situations, he aims to remain “light as a feather” with himself and others.
Fire and nature play a central role in Tom’s work. He has built a fire circle in the woods where he works with clients—often CEOs, entrepreneurs, and business owners who are successful outwardly but feel spiritually hungry. Around the fire, in a deliberately created sacred space, people relax their guards and speak more honestly. Fire becomes both symbol and portal: a grounding, elemental presence that invites release, prayer, and connection with something larger than oneself.
For younger listeners, Tom suggests paying attention to “clues” that it’s time for deeper self-inquiry: a persistent sense that there is “something more,” repeated breakdowns or crises, or what he calls “slaps from the universe.” He references life phases like the Saturn return around ages 27 and 54 as natural turning points for transformation.
The episode closes with a discussion of spiritual leadership: leaders who follow their inner guidance, honor the spirit in others, and practice solitude, reflection, and journaling. Madelyn then recommends The Transformation by Dr. James Gordon, highlighting its blend of story, science, and practical tools—like belly breathing and dialoguing with difficult emotions—as another path to meaning, healing, and resilience.
